HERE ON EARTH
Reviewed September 19th, 2001 by David Nusair
It's a pretty sad thing when a movie, seemingly completely out of ideas, inflicts a deadly disease on one of it's main characters just to have something to do for its last half hour.
Leelee Sobieski stars as the inflicted girl that is happily dating a local boy (Josh Hartnett), when one day, a rich kid (Chris Klein) makes fun of her entire way of life and gosh, she falls right in love with the lout! This is all well and good for about the first hour, but eventually the screenwriter just plum ran out of things for Klein and Sobieski to do together (they even spend an afternoon sitting under a tree reading poetry to each other!), and so he curses Sobieski with an uncurable bout of cancer.
This is, as you may have already guessed, a pretty silly movie that stretches the realm of credibility further than it has any right to go. It starts out okay with Sobieski and Hartnett a cute enough couple. But then comes Klein, in his brand new BMW, out to pick a fight. Klein shows up and starts making fun of the local boys RIGHT IN FRONT OF SOBIESKI and yet she still falls for him. This doesn’t even make sense, not even in the Bizarro world!
The actors are good but why on earth is Bruce Greenwood here? He turns in a performance that far exceeds the demands of the film. But Chris Klein. Oh, boy. This guy's performance is comparable to a tree stump. He has exactly zero screen presence and always looks uncomfortable. He has this goofy grin that just makes you want to slap him.
And then there's that tear-jerker wannabe conclusion. This development just didn't feel organic at all; it really did seem as though it was plugged in to extend the movie another half hour. Nothing much comes of it, except that Harnett gets to thoroughly embarrass himself by begging Klein to stay, for Sobieski's sake. Oh, brother.
Despite the presence of some marginally intelligent teen movies (Whatever it Takes one of them, surprisingly enough), this is about as bad as it gets.
Audio: Here on Earth is presented with a DD 5.1 soundtrack and it’s pretty good. This isn’t an active track – but when it needs to be aggressive, it is (check out the scene in which Klein crashes his car).
Video: It’s a shame that such an awful movie is accompanied by such a great transfer, but there you have it. This anamorphically enhanced 1.85:1 transfer is crisp and clean, and the many outdoor shots look vibrant and colorful.
Extras: There’s a trailer and five TV spots. A video for a truly horrendous song called “Where You Are” by Jessica Simpson (and there’s also a 30-second commercial for the soundtrack included). Finally, there’s seven additional trailers for Anna and the King, Anywhere But Here, The Beach, Drive Me Crazy, Ever After, Romeo and Juliet, and Simply Irresistible.
Conclusion: This Romeo and Juliet wannabe sinks under the weight of an awful performance by Chris Klein.
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